How a day begins? Well, I am an Architect today. I teach in a college too. But often I wonder about myself and my work that how those came to such solid beginning even though I was not 1% serious about myself and my profession. I literary jumped into this profession by my own choice. Let me confess about that. Today when I go to deliver a lecture in the classroom, I feel suffocated. The only thing makes me unsatisfied that most of the students come to this profession not by their own choice but by their parents' irresistible dreams and the resultant of time with unable to clear any Engineering or so called Medical entrance examinations. So, we found a mix culture inside the classroom. Half dozen of pupils were prepared harshly for the entrance examinations as if their aim in life would be such stupid entrance tests and if once they got admitted to a profession or undergraduate course, their life would be fulfilled. Another bunch of pupils don't know why they are here and what to do in future and the rest couple of pairs might come like a fortune to my profession, that is to study what Architecture is. In the very beginning of this writing I clearly mentioned that I was unable to catch the ideas of the profession. Yes, nothing serious about this. My life started in a typical Assamese village having 60% literacy among them 5% were aware of any technical course and 1% people knew about a professional course like Architecture. I bow to all those inspiring quotes, by which I am able to stand here to look forward. What makes me an Architect is still a question for me. I was never a confident student, always afraid of result. I did not speak a single sentence in English while I was in Assam and therefore my English is still as poor as a Japanese guy. Now , suddenly I was thrown to such a gutter where there was no relation with my usual life and forcefully I had to welcome a new style which was ready to mould few innocents like me. So, dear readers, probaly you may now able to understand my situation where and how I was fully fragmented by time and society. I missed my school days, my green village, those cows and golden rice fields, dusty paths and Assamese Bihu songs. I could not accept poha, samosa, pav bhaji and other components to make my life in a new way. But it happened. I had to. And unknowingly I did it. Many times I cried to my father for changing the institution, but if I remember, I never argued to change my Profession. May be it was the affect of the place which I was unable to accept in me. But I loved my profession very much, will be loving till my end. Then exactly what happened to me? My friends found me as a good guy having talent in both academics and non academics. But did I find myself ever? I was completely failed to understand myself and therefore I lost one year, simply failed in the examination. Probably it was the biggest learning for me. I never failed anywhere. I never asked for anything, so usually there was no meaning of fail or pass. But this time when I need to achieve something for me, I simply failed to acquire it. I started to get something and the beginning became uneasy. Then how to fight for what I want? I found myself not aware of what I want. It took many months to create that awareness inside me to say "Now have a start". I like to thank my next batch of students who accepted me as their own and helped me to create an academic awareness inside me. Finally I became an Architect, with good academic performances. I have changed A-for Architecture in my life. And I can say it is not a tough thing for anybody who has failed for the first time. Simply need a change, a self-awareness about what we want. That's enough to reach a goal.
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